Monday, 15 February 2010

The naked truth.

[Don't read if you're under 16, or if you can't handle sexual talk]

It's 1:30am, I'm supposed to be asleep and I have an exam in a few hours. But I just feel compelled to ask you this one question:

Why are people offended by nudity so much more than they are by violence?

Set all the religious reasons aside. It just doesn't make sense. Consider it this way; we all get to, errr, do 'that', at least once in our lives when we're the suitable age. They're our own bodies, it's all natural. But most of us don't get to brutally beat a living person now, do we?

An example: I'm watching TV. The scenario is very frightening. Strange creatures are attacking a woman. She has her limbs torn off, neck twisted 270 degrees and her internal organs ripped out straight through her chest. The whole scene is depicted in an extremely graphic way. My parents walk in, they see what's on, make a disgusted face and walk away.

I'm watching TV once again. This time, the scenario is quite peaceful. A woman is in her bedroom, she's changing her clothes. They show her slowly take off her clothes, and then her undergarments. Her entire body is shown. At this point, my parents walk in. What would their reaction be? And why?

Don't you see the irony?

Sunday, 7 February 2010

Oh, so fruity.

My dad brings oranges,

I like oranges,

Sometimes they have no seeds inside,

I eat 5, daily with pride,

But sometimes seeds are concealed within,

I eat none, for the win.


That is all.

Friday, 5 February 2010

Beta ye mera aik customer hai.

My parents have returned. The house is peaceful now. Hooray.


Man. I really like my dad. He knows everyone. no matter what country we're in, he's bound to run into someone he knows personally.

Summer 2003: Dubai. We're in the Wild Wadi water park. We're taking a break, having slushies, when my dad notices another guy on the nearby table. Soon, we're all sitting on the same table, talking and laughing. He was with his wife, and his wife was in a bikini. Awkward, I know.

When asked who he was, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera aik customer hai."

Summer 2004: Thailand. We're eating pineapple pizza (we had no choice) in The Pizza Company restaurant. A guy passes by us, steps back, and greets us. And for the next 10 minutes he's sitting on our table gossiping with my dad. The next day, we go to his house. He has a son who's name was too unusual for me to remember.

When asked who he was, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera aik customer hai."

Summer 2004: Singapore. We're in a science museum of some sort. Me and my dad are putting our hands inside a man-made tornado because we think it's fun. A guy grabs my dad by the shoulder and jerks him around. Suddenly, there's a lot of laughing.

When asked who he was, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera aik customer hai."

Winter 2008: Bahrain. We're getting ready for a paint ball war. I'm putting on my armour. My brothers are ready. I'm ready. But dad is missing. We wait 5 minutes, then go out to see him chatting with a stranger. We are introduced to him. The next day, we go Go-karting with him.

When asked who he was, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera aik customer hai."

Summer 2009: Malaysia. We're praying in a random mosque on a small street. When the namaz is over, the guy behind me calls to my dad. They shake hands, and suddenly they're exchanging words for 10 minutes.

When asked who he was, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera aik customer hai."

Today: Riyadh. We're in the food court of the Faisaliyah Mall. Suddenly a dude shows up with 2 shorter dudes and shakes hands with all of us. They sit down with us, and there is constant talking for ONE WHOLE HOUR.

When asked who they were, my dad replied: "Beta ye mera customers hain."

So that's my dad, Gulfguard international sales manager. Travelling the world, meeting new people.

Also, I find it strange that this never happens when we're in Pakistan.


Thursday, 4 February 2010

Junk food fo' life.




... Sorry followers, I have to eat my Big Mac. I shall blog after a while.

*5 minutes later*

I have been eating nothing but junk food for the past 5 days. My parents left for Pakistan on Sunday to attend a wedding. Did you know that I haven't been to a wedding for 15 years? I'm not even exaggerating.

So yeah. Everyday, I have to get my ass off the chair where I sit doing nothing and go to some fast food restaurant to get the healthiest, most nutritional type of food ever created in existence. Fried, extremely oily, and packed with enough Cholesterol to give 3 octogenarians a heart attack in 3 seconds. The simple fried chicken burger.

But who wants chicken? Try fried beef! Not satisfied? Try fried fish! Or why not, a shawarma? I have been having all these for lunch and dinner for the past 5 days. And nothing else.

Junk food fo' life man.

I have brothers to take care of too. Sucks. Yeah. Responsibilities... *Sigh*

I've taken the position of my parents. Both of them.

From my father's side, I have to go out to get the groceries, I have to go to Mobily to pay our cellphone bills, and I have to settle the issue of our driver living with another driver in the same room... Hah. Wait, nevermind.

From my mother's side, I have to wash the dishes, I have to iron our clothes, and I have to do the frikkin laundry. Do you have any idea what that's like? Don't even say anything, you probably don't. Unless if you're a girl.

The bright side. I finally get to understand what my parents have to go through almost every single day of their lives. Just for their children. We are a family of 7. We are 2 parents, 4 brothers and 1 sister. How many families do you know personally with this amount of people? It gets tough. Real tough. But we all manage to go through.

All the trouble we cause for our parents just by existing here, on earth. I understand. I understand all of it. If only they knew about it.

Respect. They deserve respect. A lot of it. It's time I give it to them.