Tuesday, 26 October 2010

Among Trolleys and Men.

I recently came across a thought experiment that revolves around ethics.

Behold, The Trolley Problem:

A trolley is running uncontrollably down a track. You can't stop it. On the track, at a distance, 5 people are tied down. There is no way you can free them. But there is a switch that, when you pull it, changes the track of the trolley away from the 5 people. But tied on the other track is another person. The question: Do you pull the switch because the loss of one life is better than five?

In other news, I am absolutely in love with this song.

The lyrics are terrible and the intro seems clich├ęd, yet I'm listening to it.

Music will always be the biggest enigma x_x.

The pinnacle of true epic.

This post will not be written by Talz, but his alter ego who doesn't have a name yet. He takes over Talz's body when his mind has been bombarded by video games. Warning: He tends to cuss a lot.

As you nubs may or may not know, I believe movies in video games are more emotionally powerful than Hollywood movies. Also, I like making lists and shit. They are fun. So I am making a list of the most epic cut scenes/movies in video gaming history.

Along with their Youtube links, in no particular order:

I am a CoD4 addict, and there is a reason behind it. Those fucking geniuses at Infinity Ward really know how to emotionally rape you. I died a little inside when Griggs (the black guy) tried to pull us but then gets shot after a while. But it was easy to hold myself together. But seriously, when they killed Gaz... FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU- The only soldier who actually has a sense of humor during battle and he's the first one to be shot at point blank by IMRAM ZAKHAEV HIMSELF?! MOTHER FUCKER! Why couldn't we die in his place, dammit?! And then Captain Price (The dude who slides us his pistol) dies too? THE GUY WHO WEARS A COWBOY HAT INSTEAD OF A HELMET WHEN IN WAR ALSO DIES. WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS. D:

Gaz: I got it, door's coming online, sir.
*Door opens extremely slow*
Griggs: Oh you've gotta be shittin' me!
Captain Price: Gaz, can't you make it open faster?
Gaz: Negative, but you can try pulling on it if it makes you feel better, sir.
Captain Price: Cheeky bastard...

Gaz, I will miss you old friend, and the time you praised my fruit-killing skills when I melee'd that watermelon with my knife.

*After releasing Griggs from captivity*
Griggs: It's about time, I was starting to think you guys were gonna leave me behind.
Captain Price: That was my first thought, but your arse had all the C4.

Griggs and Price, you both will be missed, too.


It seems the makers of the Call of Duty series like to end their games with high doses of epic. What's funny is that they are actually successful in doing so. Ignoring the fact that the guy who shoots us survived THREE FUCKING WAVES OF HEAVY ARTILLERY BOMBARDMENT RIGHT ON HIS FUCKING FACE, this scene got me to the edge of my seat. The way Reznov cuts down that flag is SO AWESOME, I could just watch it again and again. 

Reznov: You can make it my friend... you always survive.
You won't get what he means by that until you play the game, but that line is just SEXY.

The Final Fantasy series has the ability to give you multiple orgasms in EVERY GOD DAMN CUT SCENE THERE IS. No game character can ever live up to the standard of awesome that Zack was in. He's a fucking legend. I was emotionally attached to him from the beginning. Then BAM, he dies. Zack. Dies. FUCK. His ridiculously huge sword will be remembered for eternity and will be passed on to generations.

Random Youtube User: when zack die i crying ten minute.

Very few people have heard of this game. But it is by far the best fucking game to have ever been invented. This game is exactly why the Playstation 1 beats all it's successors. Back then, games actually had vast amounts of imagination poured into them. It's all about the graphics these days. And to think this game spanned FOUR FUCKING DISCS on the Playstation 1. I have never seen a game that long. AWESOME.

Most of you might not understand what exactly happens, but this scene had me close to tears (probably because I was around ten years old) back then. Lloyd. The traitor. The bastard. He HAD to be the one who would kill Lavitz, and with a FUCKING DRAGON BUSTER, WHAT A GAY SWORD MAN COME ON. If Dart (the one in red armour) died, I would've had no problem, even though he's the main protagonist. And this happens back when you're only in disc one. WTF are we supposed to do without Lavitz in the next three discs? Jeez. Fuck. 


Yes, another scene from the same game. I just can't stress it enough, this game is pure pwnage. This happens in disc 3. Yeah, we're hunting the bastard who killed our best friend for 2 discs and we finally confront him. I was excited as FUCK to see Dart having the balls to try and mutilate the bastard after all he had done. But no, some BITCH (who Lloyd had previously saved from a bunch of bandits just because she was a hot princess) had to come in the way and take the blow. I HOPE THAT SCAR ON YOUR BACK IS PERMANENT.
Nevertheless, this scene is intense. And well, love is beautiful.

This might not actually be a cut scene because we are actually playing the game, but what the heck. This is the part of the game where you go like FUCK MOTHER FUCKER. This is Snake, he's the most badass soldier you'll ever see. And he's been appearing in this series since the first Playstation was invented. That is why he simply cannot die. Even seeing him in a near-death situation is enough to cause a trauma. It might not seem as emotionally disturbing in the video, but when you're actually playing the game, along with the background music and the simultaneous cut scenes above, the feeling is beyond words. Fucking awesome. That is all I can say.

Monday, 25 October 2010

I am Human-Man.

I have a large collection of action figures:

I have Spider-Man.
I have Batman.
I have the Hulk.
I have Luke Skywalker.
I have Zorro.
I have the Transformers.
I have humans.
I like to play with humans. See, they have an extra special feature that other action figures do not have. That feature is called reaction. The rest of my action figures do not care how I treat them, but humans do, and it is great entertainment.

But humans are not always the action figures, they can also be the ones playing with them.
Do what everyone else is doing - go with the flow - and you become the action figure.
Choose your own direction - break the flow - and you become the one playing with them.
It's ok to be different.

Sunday, 24 October 2010

The Chinese Room

People need to stop having intellectual conversations over the internet. Like, seriously.

Tuesday, 5 October 2010

For your entertainment.

That seems like an interesting movie.

I think I might download and watch it tonight.

Oh wait, I think that's illegal.

Well no one from the authorities is watching me.

And the chances of me getting arrested is zero.

I can do anything if no one is watching!

But I didn't steal the dollar note that the man dropped on the pavement the other day.

Obviously, because it wouldn't be right.

But why is my conscience not kicking in now?

Maybe it's because I'm in the comfort and privacy of my own room.

Or maybe because everyone is doing it.

Enough pondering and let the entertainment begin!