Friday, 26 November 2010

Random post with random thoughts at random intervals

You know what pisses me off? When people ask questions like, "What is love?" and, "Does love even exist or is it our imagination?"


Firstly, people should be spending their free time asking themselves questions with much more significance and ones that will prove useful in the future, such as:

  • How will I play CoD4 online during the load shedding hours?
  • If I have already used up my smoke grenade, how will I rush around the corner and avoid being sniped?
  • What tactic should I use in a 1-on-5 situation to ensure an ace?
  • Does this map have any Defense-to-Attack spawn wall-bang spots left to discover?
  • Can I get a collateral shot in the beginning for an added advantage?
  • Why did I waste money on that failed abortion of a video game known as Black Ops?
Secondly, love is an emotion, just like joy, sadness, fear and anger. Nothing more, nothing less. People fall in love with the opposite sex (or same sex). Mothers love their sons and brothers love their sisters. The other emotions require no deep thinking, so why does love?

You know those people who keep posting 'interesting facts'? And keep posting them, and posting them, and posting them. No, I don't really have a problem with that. But when they start posting facts that they haven't even verified, that ticks me off. No, the Great Wall of China is not the only man-made structure that can be seen from the moon, oh smart one. Moreover, there is gravity in outer space, saying there is no gravity in outer space is entirely wrong. Cracking your knuckles does not cause arthritis. And goldfish do not have 3-second memory, for God's sake man. Doesn't anyone watch the Discovery Channel?!

Speaking of Goldfish, there is this theory about distorted realities. 
A goldfish dwelling in a bowl will have a distorted view of the outside world throughout it's lifetime due to the curve of the bowl. An object moving in a straight line would appear to move in a curve from the goldfish's distorted frame of reference. Assuming the goldfish is an intelligent creature, the goldfish could derive formulae to predict the motion of the moving object, even though it seems to move in a curve, and it would still hold true - since the real motion of the object will never be observed by the goldfish. What gives us the right to say our reality is not distorted as well?

Got that from a book I read once. Bonus points to anyone who can figure out which one it is. 

Maybe we live in a dust speck too, and some day Horton out there is going to hear a Who.

T-Fact of the day: I've never heard Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple. Too lazy to search it up. I know exactly what it sounds like though, since it's opening riff is the first thing every person with a guitar tries to learn, for unknown reasons. Have a tonne of their songs though. This is no joke. I haven't.

Tuesday, 23 November 2010

Quote of the Day

When life gives you lemons - don't make lemonade.
Play Cod4.

Wise words never spoken.

Monday, 15 November 2010

Retrospect.

The first few lines of the Black Ops trailer:

A lie is a lie
Just because they write it down and call it history doesn't mean it happened
We live in a world where seeing is not believing
Where only a few know what really happened
We live in a world where everything you know.. is wrong.

This is exactly what I've been asking myself for almost a decade - no exaggeration. 

Really, what if our history books never actually tell us what really happened? What if it's smokes and mirrors and a bundle of cheap tricks? 

This is for the record: History is written by the victor. History is filled with liars. If he lives and we die, his truth becomes written - and ours is lost. Shepherd will be a hero. 'Cause all you need to change the world is one good lie and a river of blood. He's about to complete the greatest trick a liar ever played on history... But only if he lives, and we die.
- Captain Price.

Ok, Infinity Ward, you can stop reading my mind now.

Maybe it wasn't Hitler who led the Holocaust. Maybe it was your great grandfather. Yes, your great grandfather.

Maybe Napoleon never used to do the hand-in-waistcoat gesture. Maybe he used to put his hand inside his pants, instead.

And maybe Charles Darwin wasn't even a naturalist. Maybe he was a pimp, usually found cruising the strip for some hoes.

We'll never know.

Monday, 8 November 2010

It is time.

Post written by alter ego, again.

OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG BLACK OPS IS BEING RELEASED TOMORROW HOLY SHITCAKES POTATO LOLCAT SHATING BRIX MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER MOTHER FUCKER

OMFG




Stfu, of course I know it's been released in black markets everywhere including Saudi Arabia and almost everyone has it. But I am still psyched for the official release.

It will probably be another fail, since Treyarch has the annoying habit of fucking up sequels of epic games. But then again, Infinity Ward totally fucked up Modern Warfare 2, too. Any PC promod player who didn't boycott Modern Warfare 2 is a sick fuck in my humble opinion. 

And if e-sports teams, especially [R]eason, Tek-9 and eSuba, move to Black Ops because it is professional-playing-worthy, I will tactically insert myself into my own asshole.  

Fans of Mazirini who think Carrera Rapida is better than Play with Soul [Mazadox] should go back to playing Halo 3. Seriously, who could hate the Mazirini vs D1ablo 1-on-1 in the beginning? (D1ablo should've won though. Lucky son of a-). And Mazirini has officially surpassed Katha as my new favourite frag movie editor, since he uses 3DS Max instead of Lightwave 3D and actually knows how to import and animate the pre-rendered CoD4 models, not to mention that the name's of Katha's movies always have something to do with young hot girls (Jailbait <- I KNOW RIGHT, WTF? And She looked 16 <- SRSLY?!). Moreover, I just found out Mazirini is extremely good-looking (no homo). 

Wait, fuck, Black Ops will probably not even run on my laptop. I hope my elder brother is putting his Alienware M11x (OMG ORGASM) to good use. FUCK MAN. FUCK.

Oh well.

Take it away, Eminem!


Sunday, 7 November 2010

River of Brakelights

I normally wouldn't post song lyrics on a post, but:

Like batteries we die, like rivers we dry
We fuel and recharge, that's humans and cars
My fun, my sun, be my homework done
Where did you go, you were my ride home.

Julian Casablancas is hot. If I were gay, I'd do him.

Earth Easter Eggs.

Since I have this obsession of discovering and exploring small island cities around the globe, I thought it would be a cool idea to open up Google Earth and do some spying of my own.


First off, we have a small piece of land, shaped somewhat like a cowboy boot, south-east of Japan and north of Papua New Guinea, called Guam. The aerial view looks pretty amazing:



I wonder what the people are like there, and if there are people that have their names starting with a question mark. 

-

Next, we have Fiji, a remote island north-north-east of New Zealand. Talk about being in the extreme east. 

Primo: Hi. Where are you from?
Secondo: Germany. You?
Primo: Fiji.
Secondo: Where on Earth is that?!
Primo: North-east of New Zealand!
Secondo: Sweet grandmother's spatula! I thought New Zealand was the edge of the world?!
Primo: :D!

Also, the trains there look like this:


Fun!

-

Finally, we have the Pitcairn Islands. Located in the very middle of the Pacific Ocean, this place is so remote I'd be surprised if this place was shown in an ordinary world map. Also, with a population of just 50, it is the land with the least number of inhabitants on earth. How awesome is that?

Teacher: How many friends do you have?
Student: I know every single person on this country personally! :D

Location of the place on Google Earth:


And zooming in the only place of multiple housing I could find was this:


This is just epic win. These people are winners for living in a place like this. Where do they get the food? Do they go to school? Do they even know what internet is? Have they ever played Call of Duty? And if so, can they beat me in it? We will never know.

And are there even any animals there? 
Speaking of animals. I recently came across a caterpillar, and being the sick, twisted failure of a nature lover that I am, I picked it up to examine it closely when its toxic hair stung the shit out of me. And since the strands of hair get stuck to your skin when you're stung, the only way to get them off is by scotch tape, which multiplies the pain. It hurts bad folks, real bad.

Thank you for joining me in my advanced stalking of remote villages.

Until then, cheers!